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Dems Ran A Campaign, But Repubs Fought A War

by Steve Young

Musings Over January 20

I awoke from Inauguration Day and faced the inevitable. George Bush, who was never elected in the first place, was now elected in the second place.

Would the Lords of Loud celebrate? Not my Bloviating Band of Broadcasters. They would do just what they pretty much do every day...gloat. Not only gloat, but do as my friend and great American, Sean Hannity, would do: demean and divide.

Why is this day different that any other?

It isn't.

Sean asked his audience to imagine how sick to their stomachs they would be if it was John Kerry receiving the oath. He said that would mean that besides Kerry on the stand, we would find Joe Biden, Hillary Clinton, Ted "Hiccup" Kennedy (still funny the zillionth time Sean does it -- and they say the right can't do satire). 'Course, being Senators, Joe, Hillary, and Ted were up there anyway.

Other than constantly goading the left to get over their loss, you could tell the LOL were running out of things to keep the divisive fire in the audience's belly during inauguration week. Luckily, they could play burn- the- witch with California Senator Barbara Boxer, who had the audacity to challenge Secretary of State nominee Condi Rice.

Anyone listening to Boxer's "mean-spirited interrogation" heard her point out numerous documented specifics of Condi misstating the truth in her testimony. The LOL, who all played edited versions of the questioning, belittled Boxer and her radical (lack of) principles instead of addressing the issues. How many times have we heard them say that Democrats never discuss the issues? How many times will this Jaberwocky- meets- Orwell strategy work? Every time.

Kerry also confronted Condi at the hearing and the LOL would have gone after him, too, but he ran his questioning the same way he did his campaign, so drawing anything from his statements would probably just be too confusing.

So, why is this day be different than any other?

It isn't.

I wondered if the inauguration, this final nail in the Kerry coffin -- the not-his inauguration -- would once and for all drive home the point that the Democrats had run a campaign and had lost miserably, while the Republicans fought a war and won miserably Make no mistake: they treated the election like a blood and guts war, and in any war you want to win, you get 100 percent behind the effort. The Republicans did. The Democrats...lost.

There was never a Republican discussion of the issues. It was outright, "They're bad, we're God's chosen candidates." No grey areas. No debates (even when Bush was supposed to). Just black and white. When they were caught, they said they weren't. When they lied they said they hadn't. And their minions bought it lock, stock, and Cheney. Their constituency didn't quarrel over details...or facts.

Talk radio pretty much says all Democrats, other than Zell Miller, are evil. They also say that Democrats think all conservatives are more evil. Neither of those statements are anywhere near true, but the LOL loyalists bought it. And they will continue to.

So, my friends. There's almost two or three months before the 2008 presidential campaign begins. Whomever the Democrats choose to run the party has got to start whispering in the ear of every potential candidate, "It's not a campaign. IT'S A FUCKING WAR!" And we have to start treating it like it is.

It's really very easy. We have more voters than they do. If every Democrat votes for the Democratic candidate, the Democrat will win. It's that simple. If every Republican who disagreed with the conservative right voted Libertarian, they'd lose, too. They don't. Know why? Because they want to win.

Why are we working so hard to screw it up? We must start getting used to biting our erudite tongues and begin spitting out, "They're Satan. We're pleasant-tasting. They're anti-every-American-value. We're for 'em." Black and white. And we'll need 100 percent black next time. No shades. No divergent discourse. Best thing? We don't have to believe it. For Christ's sake, we don't believe half the things we say anyway. It won't feel very good, but how good does it feel watching the very people on the right, chortling "political capital" and doctrine, up on that podium swearing an oath?

The left must get a grasp on the concept that ANYTHING left of right is fine and no matter how conflicted that will make our side...that is our side. At least at election time. If you want to win. Better...if you don't want them to.

Why is this day different than any other?

Only if you start to make it so.

It's a war, mate. And if you need a little help, here's the first salvo...

Steve Young is the Political Editor of National Lampoon, creator of and Talk Radio columnist for The Albion Monitor

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Albion Monitor January 19, 2005 (

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